| Thomas Gass. 29th September, 2005 - 11:46 am
 On FOX Television’s wildly popular medical drama House, a brilliant but socially-inept doctor finds himself in the most precarious position week in and week out, having to RISK A PATIENT’S LIFE! in order to save them from imminent death.
Each show follows a rather predictable linearity of events; patient enters hospital with a seemingly benign problem that escalates into a full-blown medical crisis, doctors diagnose the problem and begin treatment, patient gets worse, doctors revise the diagnosis, patient still worsens, brilliant but socially-inept doctor finally solves the perplexing medical puzzle and patient inevitably gets better just in time for the credits to roll.
In a similar way the Patriots dynasty has become the House of the NFL; predictable, yet extremely successful. Each key victory seems to follow a similar series of events: Brady starts off hot, cools down a bit just as the opposition begins to heat up, defense comes to the rescue with a few critical plays, Brady heats up again right before the half, defense continues keeping the game close until Brady orchestrates his patented two-minute march down the field and into field goal range, and Adam Vinatieri kicks the game-winning field goal just as time expires.
In honor of House and our repetitive, yet exciting football team it’s time to hand out this week’s honors:
Heroes
Tom Brady – Brilliant but socially-inept doctor as brilliant but socially-awkward quarterback. Trade the entendres for a healthy set of legs and suddenly you have the football version of Dr. House; a man dedicated who can think five steps ahead of everybody else, rarely falters in pressure situations, and by the end has provided his masterstroke to fix the situation. 12-12 in the final quarter, one game-winning drive; just another day at the office.
Logan Mankins – Hard to believe he’s just a rookie. Still, like Dr. Cameron, he possesses a talent far superior than his inexperience would lead you to believe. On a day when he effectively had to cover [i]two[/i] line positions (lending support to an overmatched Nick Kaczur), Mankins still created bus-sized holes for the running game as well as aptly keeping the Steeler front at bay.
Adam Vinatieri – Cool, collected, just like Dr. Foreman. Is there anybody that can handle kicking in Heinz Field better than Adamatic?
Zeroes
Nick Kaczur – On Sunday Kaczur pulled his best Dr. Lisa Cuddy impression, nothing but a minor inconvenience, a pushover roadblock. Yeah, it’s wrong to pick on a guy who was forced to play out of position at left tackle due to an injury to Matt Light, but Kaczur was continually slow off the snap, allowing Pittsburgh pass rushers in the backfield numerous times.
The Clock Operator – Just like Chi McBride’s role as benefactor Edward Vogler, the 52 seconds were nothing but a pointless add-on that will continue to infuriate fans. Gee, nothing like giving Steeler fans a reason to discredit another Patriot clutch performance by accidentally refreshing the clock after a play run by the Steelers. Even worse was that an NFL employee in New York noticed the error and called the officiating crew, who still saw nothing wrong.
Chad Scott – Again, you can’t fault a guy called upon to fill in for a depleted secondary, and that Scott made the list shows how strong of an all-around performance the Pats put forth, but that pass interference penalty…zeesh. It wasn’t so much the penalty, which was actually understandable, just what led [i]to[/i] that penalty, namely Scott tripping up at the line.
What You May Have Missed
I know I gush about Mankins’ style of play to the point where it’s borderline man-crushing, but this Sunday watch him on passing downs. Against Pittsburgh, I counted five times where Mankins stood the defensive lineman completely upright, knocking him from his low-center of gravity attack and effectively eliminated him from rushing in on Brady. Usually a lineman is taught to knock his defensive counterpart down, for fear that an upright lineman can tip a ball at the line, but Mankins has done the complete opposite; he’s overpowered the defensive lineman by going up and over and eliminating any semblance of forward momentum. |
