| Authored by Randolph Charlotin - 26th July, 2005 - 1:39 pm
 Say what you want about Terrell Owens. I surely haven't been very complementary of the All-Pro receiver. But I do respect him. He truly is one of the best receivers in the league. But more importantly, despite his displeasure with his contract, he says he will arrive on time for training camp. For that he earns my respect.
All off-season, Owens has griped about how much he earns. Considering he already is one of the top paid receivers in the league, one must wonder how much more does he want? He declared on more than one occasion that he'd be open to being traded in order to get his riches.
According to the powers that be in Philadelphia, they will not send Owens packing, and who can blame them? What's the chances of finding a wide out of his caliber either in a trade or through the draft? It's best to hold on to him.
But what if...
What if Philly did fulfill T.O.'s wishes to play elsewhere for market value? Whichever team acquired him knows what they are getting as a player. The bonus is what they'd get from Owens as an entertainer.
We remember his actions as a San Francisco 49er when it came to celebrating touchdowns. Heck, we don't say, "yo, you remember when T.O. did..." Owens took celebrations to such a level that his antics go by name: The Sharpie. The Dallas Star. The pom-poms. And he continued his legacy in Philadelphia, starting with flapping his wings.
Expectations would be high for Owens after his first TD with a new club. Fans would be on the edge of their seats in anticipation of what he would do next. Sorry to play spoiler, but peeking into his book of choreographed touch-dances, this is just a sampling of what we will see if he played elsewhere:
Pittsburgh Steelers - He motions using a sledgehammer to drive a stake into the heart.
Houston Texans - A one-man line dance with thumbs hooked into his waistline.
New York Jets - He prances in the endzone with arms fully extended, simulating a jet in flight. Like the private jet he bought with his new signing bonus.
New York Giants - Always a fan of children's stories, T.O. runs through the back of the endzone, jumps into the crowd, and eats a small child a la the giant in "Jack and the Beanstalk."
Dallas Cowboys - As a 'boy, fans would love watching Terrell make a b-line to the center star and stare up into the heavens. They'd especially love it when Darren Woodson knocks Owens off the star every time.
Detroit Lions - Actions speak louder than words, but not in this case. In every post-game interview, Owens repeats he loves playing for the team and would had played for less money. Yup, Terrell is a Detroit Lyin'.
Minnesota Vikings - After conquering another defense, he turns in wrath on the crowd. Raping is illegal, but nothing can stop him from pillaging by taking a wallet or purse from a fan.
Green Bay Packers - Owens simulates packing his bags for the next team he will play for.
Oakland Raiders - Owens has been displaying a Raider-like attitude for years so it wouldn't be for show.
Seattle Seahawks - A receiver actually catching a touchdown pass in these parts deserves praise. |
